In this episode, Stacy sits down with Dr. Kimberly Hambrick, who owns Kimberly Hambrick Consulting, and is an Executive Director with the John Maxwell Team and serves on the President’s Advisory Committee. The two discuss how to create a growth plan and bust through your beliefs that are holding you back.
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Transcript For This Episode:
Welcome to Marketing Mistakes (And How to Avoid Them). I’m Stacy Jones, the founder of influencer marketing and branded content agency, Hollywood Branded. This podcast provides brand marketers a learning platform for topics for us to share their insights and knowledge on topics which make a direct impact on your business today. While it is impossible to be well-versed on every topic and strategy that can improve bottom line results, my goal is to help you avoid making costly mistakes of time, energy, or money, whether you are doing a DIY approach or hiring an expert to help. Let’s begin today’s discussion.Speaker 2 (00:31):
Welcome to Marketing Mistakes (And How to Avoid Them). Here’s your host, Stacy Jones.Stacy Jones (00:36):
Welcome to Marketing Mistakes (And How to Avoid Them). I’m Stacy Jones. I’m so happy to be here with you all today, and I want to give a very warm welcome to Dr. Kimberly Hambrick. Kimberly is a leadership development and growth coach and trainer. She designs empowered leaders to achieve the significance they desire. Known as the BS Buster, she works to bust through their BS, belief systems, that is, of negative thought and excuses with a proven system that minimizes risks and moves them forward. She owns Kimberly Hambrick Consulting and is an executive director with the John Maxwell team and serves on the president’s advisory committee. Kimberly has almost three decades of experience in corporate America, serving in leadership roles with a focus on coaching others to achieve more. Today, we’re going to talk about creating growth plans and busting through your beliefs that are holding you back. We’ll learn what’s worked from Kimberly’s perspective, what should be avoided and how some people just miss the mark. Kimberly, welcome.
Kimberly Hambrick (01:30):
Wow. Thank you so much, Stacy. It’s so great to talk with you and to share some insights, hopefully, with your listeners.
Stacy Jones (01:37):
I always like talking about BS, or belief systems.
Kimberly Hambrick (01:37):
Stacy Jones (01:41):
I think that’s an important thing. Yes. Yes. So as we start off, could we have you share a little bit about how you got to where you are today? How is this an area that you specialize in and how’d you get started?
Kimberly Hambrick (01:55):
Absolutely. So as you said, I have almost three decades of corporate experience, and you can see me so you know I didn’t start when I was 12. It’s obvious that I look like I’ve had 30 years in the corporate world. I started as an educational consultant, so I worked with companies where I did business development, corporate growth. I wrote multi-year, multi-million dollar projects. I was so great at winning the work. What happened in companies like that is that we would put people in leadership roles and we put them in the leadership role based on their resume, and that didn’t always translate to being an effective leader.It started to weigh on me that I was putting people in positions where they weren’t going to be successful, and the corporations that I worked with weren’t offering training to them.
So, I just decided I could do better. I could do more. I stepped out on my own to do my own consulting business, where I focus exclusively on empowering leaders to see their full potential, to use their full potential and to use that to add significance to others. What I mean by that is John Maxwell says, “Success is when you add value to yourself, but significance is when you add value to others.” That’s really what my work is all about.
Stacy Jones (03:18):
That’s a really great quote.
Kimberly Hambrick (03:21):
I love it. I wish I said it, but it was John.
Stacy Jones (03:23):
That’s okay. You just said it. You can repeat it. You gave him credit, so it’s now part of you and who you are.
Kimberly Hambrick (03:27):
It’s part of me. Yes.
Stacy Jones (03:32):
Now, you just said something that’s really interesting. That in corporate America, and quite frankly, in businesses of all sizes, we look at resumes and we move people into positions based off of titles, based off of experience, based off of gloss and glamor, things that we put a lot of assumptions to. That’s part of our belief systems, of someone’s going to be able to step up and do it and be that all heroic person who is a good leader, but that’s just not always the case, right?
Kimberly Hambrick (04:01):
Absolutely. I have conversations like this daily with CEOs and leaders in the corporate world, because there might be a position that’s coming open. When they start to talk about who could fill that position, they’ll start to talk about a person at a job level and they’ll say, “Well, Stacy’s been here for 20 years so it’s her time to advance.” Well, Stacy, you’ve never worked or aspired or are aligned with it. It’s really difficult for leaders to step out of that and look at someone’s potential. I look at someone’s potential to do the work and then we move them into that work and we give them the tools and the resources that they need to grow. At the same time, you let them know what the accountability steps are. So if they’re not meeting those targets, they have an opportunity to change and improve. But if not, then you can move them out. But so many times we promote people or hire people based on what their resume says. Let’s be honest, a lot of our resumes are creative writing.
Stacy Jones (05:16):
Or a little bit of BS.
Kimberly Hambrick (05:18):
Well, that’s my favorite word, but yes. Full disclosure, I mean, because I got caught in a BS trap early on in my career. I started at… My Bachelor’s is in journalism and I’d worked at a newspaper and I did pagination. I laid out the newspaper. So I was applying for another job and it said, “Do you know…” And it named a specific program. That’s pagination. I knew pagination and I said, “Yes, I know it.” I show up for the interview and they put me in front of the computer and they want me to lay out a newsletter. I’m pretty sure my excitement of actually opening up said program and creating a file gave away that I didn’t know that program.
Stacy Jones (06:10):
The opening up eclipsed your actual skill level. Yes.
Kimberly Hambrick (06:14):
Absolutely. So the first thing I did after that glorious attempt at ad-libbing to my skillset is I went home, redid my resume and folks, this was back in the day when you had to type it and go and have it printed. That was not easy.
Stacy Jones (06:33):
No. I’m sure it was a really good learning lesson though for you.
Kimberly Hambrick (06:36):
Stacy Jones (06:37):
But how did that change your own belief system about yourself at that point?
Kimberly Hambrick (06:41):
Well, at that point, it didn’t change it. To be perfectly honest, I suffered what I call from limiting self-beliefs well into my 40s and early 50s, and I was successful. I was always advancing in my work and my career and from the outside looking in, nobody thought I had any issues. But if you suffer from limiting belief systems or what I call the BS swirl of negative thoughts that were just going rampant in my mind, at some point you butt up against a lid and you cannot outperform your belief system of yourself. So even though from the outside I looked successful, I was starting to struggle with that and it was getting to the point that I valued more what other people said or thought about me then I did for my own voice. As somebody who suffered long-term, and if you have people who enter your life that know you suffer from this… Imagine a conversation, Stacy, where you and I are talking and you come into my office and say, “Do you know what your problem is?”
Well, now I’m wondering what my problem is. I didn’t have a problem two seconds ago, but you, who I admire and respect, just told me I had a problem. so now there I go swirling into, “Oh my gosh, I have a problem. I’m incompetent. Why am I here?” It really took what I call a gut kick in my life of somebody just not being kind and nice to me to make me realize just how bad my own self-talk was to myself. At that point I had to change it. I didn’t do it overnight. I don’t want anybody to think this was an overnight snap the fingers and I was all good. But one of the simplest things that I did, and I have my clients do this, is to keep track of what follows your ‘I am’. I would write down what I would say about myself, and it was shocking and hurtful to hear how I spoke about myself so effortlessly. I didn’t even hear it coming out.
“I’m not good enough. I’m not successful in this job.”Once I saw that, I had to make a mental break and I had to work on changing my mental swirl, if you will, about what I said about myself. I’m going to be honest with you. It’s an ongoing process, but I’m at a point in my life that if I start, if that BS bubbles up, which it does, I can recognize it right away. And then I ask myself a few questions. The first question is, “Is there any truth to this?” If there isn’t, bless and release it. If there is truth to it, then I ask myself, “What do I want to address?” This is an important step that I talk with people about all the time. Just because there’s truth to it, I don’t have to address it if I don’t want to. That’s where we have power.
It’s just been truly night and day difference of how I talk about myself, but more importantly, the people that I attract now into my life, because it’s the law of attraction. When you feel good about yourself, when you’re putting out positive, good, empowering vibes, those are the people that come into your circle, and the others who were toxic, they’re not in my circle anymore.
Stacy Jones (10:30):
Yeah. Because like likes like. It really is true. I mean, that law of attraction will get you every single time.
Kimberly Hambrick (10:39):
Stacy Jones (10:40):
But what I love that you said… We all have these thought patterns in our head. I mean, every last person. No one’s like, Oh, “I’m the best person,” all the time in our life. But you mentioned that you can fill in a word and you were seeing negatives that you were filling in, but you were getting yourself to fill in those words and those negatives were coming out. But that means all of those negatives were in your subconscious, just swirling around and literally painting every action, every thought, everything that you were doing in your world, even if you weren’t verbalizing them up until that point.
Kimberly Hambrick (11:18):
Absolutely. As I started to look into this, people that have known me since elementary, junior high, high school, I’m still dear friends with them. They’re like, “We didn’t even notice any of this about you.” Well, it just became ingrained in my psyche, if you will, that I was always less than. You learn to overcompensate. So as a child, if I was less than, over here I’m making straight A’s and I’m excelling. As you move forward in your career, if you feel less than, you’re going to 250% a day to get to the next level. When you get to the next level, you don’t take time to celebrate that. That was such a key for me, and I see that in a number of other people that I talk with. When they work so hard to get to that next level or whatever their goal is, and then they still stay head down and they look at what’s next. It’s like, take time to celebrate the good that you just did. Because that says to me, “I’m worth it. I’m worth taking a few minutes to celebrate.”
Stacy Jones (12:27):
Right, and it’s easy. It’s easy to plow. Especially when you are in an executive position or a leadership position where there’s always something else that needs to go, and there’s always another deadline and there’s always another hurdle and there’s always another mountain to climb. It’s hard to take those moments to stop and breathe and think, and just celebrate and have a moment and be at peace.
Kimberly Hambrick (12:49):
Yeah. Absolutely. From a leadership perspective, I was doing all that for my team. I was constantly mentoring and coaching and seeing them achieve their growth, and then I’m back here thinking, “Hmm, I forgot about me along the way.” At some point I was going to tap out in the corporate world. There’s no other way to say it. I got into a position where my supervisor was my exact same age, so I’m not going anywhere. He’s not going anywhere. I started to feel like I brought no value to the organization, even though I brought tremendous value. But at that point, my mindset was, “I’m only going to be valued if I’m at that next level.”
Stacy Jones (13:36):
Yeah. What happens to you when you actually have gotten to the top?
Kimberly Hambrick (13:41):
Well, what I do now, and a lot of the leadership work that I did started first and foremost with myself, to enhance my own leadership skills, and what you see a number of times with people who reach that pinnacle of leadership, they stop growing. It’s like you get comfortable, and that is such a bad word in society, to get comfortable with where you are. They start to do things like, “I’m the leader, and as the leader, I say this.” And they talk about themselves in the third person. And I’m like, “Oh no, we need to talk about that.” But we’re always growing. One of my mentors says it so well. He said that he really struggled because he was bigger on the outside than he was on the inside. What he meant by that is he was always advancing, always looking for that next hurdle, and he stopped doing the inward growth that is so needed before this.
These days I am so much better on the inside and I am so much happier and I don’t have a corner office or a fancy title. I found what I need to be doing. I really think when you get comfortable with a healthy belief system, you start to recognize your own potential and your own gifts, if you will. When you lean into those and when you use those, it doesn’t matter what they call you. It truly doesn’t.
Stacy Jones (15:23):
So for our listeners today who are listening in and saying, “Okay, I might have one of those little voices in my head, too, that sometimes says, ‘I’m not enough,'” what do they need to do? What’s the first step that they need to actually do to start making a change in their lives?
Kimberly Hambrick (15:41):
Well, the first step was the one that I just said, which is very easy. Document how you talk about yourself. So, document what you say about yourself. Another way is to reach out to a trusted few, so your circle, your family, and ask them, “What do you see as my strengths?” If you’re in a leadership role, “What’s it like to be across the table from me?” Because that’s really telling, and you’ll start to see some gaps. You’ll start to realize that external people view you completely different than you view yourself, and then you try to make some steps forward to close that gap.
I also include people that I know that don’t like me into that conversation, because once you get past the bitterness and the hurt, there are some nuggets of truth in there. But I’m going to be real. You have to be thick skinned and you have to be in a good place, and I didn’t do that right away. I had to get healthy with my own belief system before I could go out and ask somebody who I know does not care for me to say, “Hey,” and they tell you.
Stacy Jones (16:52):
Whew. It’s amazing how people don’t usually have a problem telling you what you’re doing wrong in life.
Kimberly Hambrick (17:00):
In life, on social media, if you don’t ask-
Stacy Jones (17:03):
Oh, that’s an easy one.
Kimberly Hambrick (17:04):
Yeah. If you don’t ask for it. I mean, yeah. That’s why it’s so important for me that people understand. We know that’s going to come at us constantly and we have to be at a secure enough place in our own belief about ourselves that I like to think that I’m Wonder Woman sometimes. So we’re deflecting all the negative things that are coming at us. But if you don’t work on yourself first, and if you don’t get your inner core right, we’re a sponge. At some point a sponge gets oversaturated with all the negative that people are saying about us, and it’s not a good place to be. So if you feel like you can’t articulate what’s good about yourself, start focusing on what you’re saying about yourself, first and foremost. To be perfectly honest, work with somebody to help you through this. So I coach people, but I have coaches. That’s so important because I’m in a constant growth system myself. It’s not that I’m not good enough. It’s I want to continue to improve, and that’s how I would answer that one.
Stacy Jones (18:27):
Yeah. I have a couple of phrases that we use with our team members at work, and the first is, “As long as you’re growing and contributing, you have a place at our agency.” Right? Because you’re growing, you’re contributing and that’s fantastic. There’s no stopping you. There’s no level. There’s no top of the ceiling that you’re going to hit on that. But that’s all driven, also, by you have to have passion and drive. It’s a combination. You have to be eagerly seeking growth and eagerly seeking ways that you can contribute back to others, and then you also have to have the ability to self-light your flame so that you are the one that’s full of passion because no one… It’s taken me so long as a business owner to come to terms with the fact that I can be as morale-boosting and giving education and opportunities, if someone doesn’t have passion and want to actually be there and light themselves up, there’s nothing I can do. It’s just not going to work. It’s just, they’re going to be what they are and I need to stop focusing on the fact of my energy into that.
And then that third thing of that drive of actually, that pursuit of excellence, that pursuit to get yourself over the top. I think that all applies to what you’re saying with how you actually need to approach how to get that BS going and your belief systems changed where you’re going to have to want to grow. You’re going to have to want to figure out how you can contribute to yourself. You’re going to have to have the passion to drive yourself to that, as well.
Kimberly Hambrick (20:02):
Yeah. I love so much about what you just said, and you called me out for taking notes earlier so I’m not taking notes, but the first-
Stacy Jones (20:11):
You can listen to this earlier. You can listen to this podcast later. It’s all perfect.
Kimberly Hambrick (20:14):
And I’ll take notes. But light your own flame is so important because you know the old phrase, “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink”? That’s what this is about. How many times do we put opportunity after opportunity after opportunity in front of people and they don’t want it. We can’t invest energy in people who aren’t willing, first and foremost, to invest in themselves. And then we were talking earlier about looking at resumes. There are a couple of companies that I talk with them and they don’t look at the resume. They do an interview to find out if the person is a good fit for the culture and the values, because you can’t train on those two things. Either you’re a good fit or not. The skillset you can train on, but finding that good fit. Some people are completely against that. That is such a foreign idea. They don’t know what that means, but that’s what you’re talking about. You’re talking about people who have that passion, who have that drive, who want to see the organization advance and not their own advancement.
Stacy Jones (21:29):
Right. Because they’re tied to it. If the organization advances, you advance. I mean, I constantly have interns and employees ask how I ended up owning an agency and what I did earlier on in my career and what steps do they need to take? I’m like, “You need to be a solution solver. That’s it.” You need to find problems and you need to provide a fix without anyone asking you so that you’re continuously growing and learning and you’re not asking people to teach you necessarily. You’re asking for insights and feedback and instruction, but you actually are getting yourself to that next step. Because otherwise, no matter what their resume’s painted like and looks like, even 20 years into their career, if they don’t have that, and they’re not a solution solver, then they’re not going to be able to actually be a leader because part of the whole leadership is identifying problems and solving them and helping other peoples find the way to solve them as well.
Kimberly Hambrick (22:22):
Oh, that right there is a sound bite. You clip that one out and you use it. I mean, I’m so serious about that because that is so true. How many people are so quick to point out the problems and then wash their hands of it and say, “It’s not my responsibility”? Well, that’s not helpful. What’s helpful is bringing a solution, and what’s even more helpful is having a leader who is open to other solutions being brought to his or her attention and not thinking that he or she needs to be the be all end all. This is uncharted waters for some leaders to accept that maybe somebody on their team has a better idea than them.
Stacy Jones (23:08):
Kimberly Hambrick (23:09):
Like, guess [crosstalk 00:00:23:10].
Stacy Jones (23:09):
Kimberly Hambrick (23:10):
Stacy Jones (23:11):
Someone who could be 22 or 23 years old could have the better idea.
Kimberly Hambrick (23:15):
Yeah. Less experience. Didn’t go to the same school. When I was coming up through the education consulting world, I was, I say, forced to get my doctorate. I’m glad I did it, but I did it on my own terms. But I didn’t get my doctorate at the same school other people that I worked with did, so mine was always less than because of theirs. And I’m like, “It doesn’t matter.” It’s a-
Stacy Jones (23:40):
It’s a piece of paper.
Kimberly Hambrick (23:42):
Yes. It’s what you do. All of this that we’re talking about is application. It’s what you do with all this information that you’re pulling in from life experiences, from education, from the school of hard knocks, whatever you want to call it. We take it in and what do we do about it? I chuckle because I call myself the new AAA. It’s all about application because one of my favorite quotes from Les Brown is, and I’m going to paraphrase it because I’m going to butcher it, “If information was all we need, we’d all be happy, thin and rich.” Well, I’m not. You take that information in and use it. That’s the thing about just looking at people’s resumes or their tenure in a position. Just because they’re acquiring knowledge and experience doesn’t mean that they’re using it, or doesn’t mean that they’re comfortable enough to make that pivot that they need to. I know pivot is one of the buzzwords of 2020, but-
Stacy Jones (24:49):
Not COVID? COVID’s not a buzzword? Because I think COVID is the buzzword.
Kimberly Hambrick (24:55):
Well, because of COVID we had to pivot.
Stacy Jones (24:56):
Kimberly Hambrick (25:00):
Yup. I always say this and I always say it with all lowercase letters, it’s fascinating to see the leadership decisions that have been being made. I know you see companies and organizations who believe the only way the business can be done is if the people are sitting in the office on the same floor getting everything done. And then, boom. COVID hits and people have to work from home. For a lot of companies, I talk with them. I’m like, “How’s the work going?” “Oh, it’s doing great.” “Are you missing any of your targets?” “No.” “What does that tell you?”
Stacy Jones (25:35):
You can work from remote quite a bit more. Yes.
Kimberly Hambrick (25:39):
Yes. Just seeing some of that, again, back to mindset belief systems, seeing some of that break down, that work can happen and you don’t have to micromanage people and things are happening differently, that you’re rethinking the markets that you’re in and how to still do work where you can. So it’s fascinating, but with all lowercase letters.
Stacy Jones (26:07):
I think a lot of us would have been willing to spend the last many, many, seven plus months, not necessarily learning this fascinating thing quite so soon and all in one lump.
Kimberly Hambrick (26:20):
Yeah, I agree. There’s a meme or a cartoon going around where God’s talking to Gabriel and God’s asking Gabriel what he’s doing for the 2020s and Gabriel’s like, “Wait, is that plural? You mean I was supposed to stretch all of this out over 10 years and not put it all into [crosstalk 00:26:42].”
Stacy Jones (26:41):
All in one year?
Kimberly Hambrick (26:45):
We’re not through it yet, and I’m not making light of it because it’s been horrible for so many people, but there’s good that is coming out of it as well. Some of the things that I’m seeing, taking it back to a leadership perspective, are leaders who are more heart-centered and people-focused. A crisis didn’t make them that way. A crisis just allowed them to elevate it and refine it, if you will. You’re just not hopping on a Zoom call or whatever your platform is to have a meeting without checking in with your team first. It’s so simple. It’s so simple just to say, “Hey Stacy, how’s it going, really?” And then sitting back and letting you talk, because one of the things that I see so many teams understanding is we’re all in the same storm, but it’s impacting us differently. When you start to tear down a little bit and understand that your teammates are struggling with some things, you give a little more grace to them if they miss a deadline. Yeah.
Or I see people reaching out because they don’t have small children at home and they’re like, “Let me step in and help you with this piece of work.” That didn’t happen much before and it happens now, where people aren’t concerned or threatened that their job will be in jeopardy because somebody is going to help them.
Stacy Jones (28:10):
Or it helps having the Zoom meeting going on and having the child run like a banshee all through the background, and everyone’s like, “Wow, I’m glad I don’t have that going on right now. I bet I can help out a little bit more.”
Kimberly Hambrick (28:22):
Absolutely. In a couple of teams that I work with, it was probably about two, two and a half weeks into all of this where I just said, “Listen, we’re no longer apologizing for the children.”
Stacy Jones (28:34):
Or the dogs barking.
Kimberly Hambrick (28:35):
Oh, yeah. I mean, I don’t want to hear, “I’m sorry,” anymore, because it’s life. I literally was on a call one time and I’m not joking, I looked down and my dog is barfing on the floor and I’m like, “I’ll get that later. I got nothin’.”
Stacy Jones (28:51):
Just let it go. Okay.
Kimberly Hambrick (28:52):
Yeah. And not just [crosstalk 00:28:55].
Stacy Jones (28:55):
[crosstalk 00:28:55] something else. Why not? I keep on getting hit by things. Why not bring me a new thing to experience?
Kimberly Hambrick (29:01):
Yeah. Well, I don’t ask that because I’m terrified. I don’t know about you, but I have friends who are the king and queens of meme. So, what? There were murder hornets that are supposed to be coming our way. There’s blood sucking mosquitoes. I don’t want to know. I don’t want to know.
Stacy Jones (29:20):
Well, so how can our listeners learn more about you? Where can they find information and find you if they want to work with you?
Kimberly Hambrick (29:27):
Oh, well, thank you. I would love that. So as you said, the name of my company is Kimberly Hambrick Consulting. So that’s my website, www.kimberlyhambrickconsulting. I’m probably more prevalent on LinkedIn as Kimberly Hambrick, so definitely connect with me. I’m all about helping people see their full potential and giving them the tools and strategies that they need to use their full potential, because it’s a win-win. When I allow people to see their own growth and potential, they then move forward to help others see their own growth and potential. 2020, it’s a year where we really need to be a little kinder and a little more compassionate, and what better way to do it than to take time to see your own potential and growth, and then move it out to the world.
Stacy Jones (30:23):
100% agree. Well, I really have enjoyed speaking with you, so thank you-
Kimberly Hambrick (30:27):
Oh, thank you.
Stacy Jones (30:27):
… so much for joining us. You just really gave a good last words or parting advice, but since I didn’t say, “Can you give us some last words or parting advice?” any other last words or parting advice besides being humble and having grace and giving yourself a break of it and checking your BS meter?
Kimberly Hambrick (30:50):
I said a lot. One of the things that was very impactful for me, that a mentor said to me as I was working through all of this and why I do what I do, the mentor said to me, “Borrow the belief I have in you until your belief matches mine.” That was just so powerful to me, and I find myself paying it forward because of that. That would be what I would say to somebody. If you’re struggling with your belief system, find that one champion, find somebody in your life who sees you differently and borrow their belief in you until you can match it.
Stacy Jones (31:31):
We should end on that note, but I’m not because you just started something else there, but it’s true. If you’re not full, if you’re not able to fill yourself up with confidence or sleep or anything where you can actually be in balance, to some degree, you can’t give and you can’t support. That’s why it is so important as a leader, or just anywhere in life that you’re finding yourself as a partner to someone, that you have to figure this stuff out so that you actually can be better at providing significance, which is what you started this conversation off with, to others.
Kimberly Hambrick (32:16):
Absolutely. One of the things that I firmly believe, we’re not meant to travel our journeys alone. That could be with a significant other, a family member, friends, coaches, whatever. There’s no shame in getting to the point where you say, “I need somebody to help me forward” That’s what this is all about. So I love that you said that. Thank you.
Stacy Jones (32:37):
Yeah, of course. Well, Kimberly, thank you again so much for joining us today. Really do appreciate it.
Kimberly Hambrick (32:43):
Oh, my pleasure. My pleasure.
Stacy Jones (32:45):
To all of our listeners, thank you for tuning into another episode of Marketing Mistakes (And How to Avoid Them). I look forward to chatting with you this next week.
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